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WHAT THE FUCK. THE HELL WAS THAT? NO NO NO. I REFUSE TO ACCEPT THIS. THEY CAN NOT DO THAT...  WHAT THE FUCK.

SPOILERS!!! )
I'm still going to be watching, but right now I'm not loving it. And I tried to like it, I really did, I was positive about it and didn't hate on any of the characters. But I'm not so impressed when I look at the overall picture. Some episodes were good, but there weren't many that I OMG LOVED!.

Something just went wrong for me, and I'm not sure about what set it off.

ETA: Or rather, I am missing the RTD era, basically.
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The finale is tonight. I haven't talked much about Lost in this journal, but in honour of tonight, I will.

I started watching Lost in 2004, after seeing the promos for it on my tv; I was a 13/14 year old at the time. I thought it looked awesome, so I decided to check it out when it premiered, a long with my best friend. Ever since then, Lost has been in my life. I've fangirled with my best friend about it, I've gotten other friends of mine interested in the show, I've scribbled on my school books about it, and I even made a big collage at one point. I may have fallen out of love with the show at times, but it has been such a big part of my life, that it holds a special place in my heart. It was Lost that was my first real show, and my first real obsession. Other girls would be watching teenage drama's and I'd be watching Lost. Jack from Lost(Matthew Fox) was my first celebrity crush, when I was around 13/14 years old, and I have many fond memories of my fangirling over him. Jack and Kate were my first ship, and to this day, remain the only ship I've ever written a finished piece of work about.

The countless of times I've annoyed my friends by ranting about Lost, the tears I've cried, the fangirling, the laughing, the excitement, it has all been such a big part of my teenage years, and it is both a very sad and very nostalgic night, now that it is ending.

I fell out of love with Lost a few years ago, but before then I hadn't missed a single episode of the show. I missed a lot after that, but this year when I heard it was ending, I decided to get into it again, because I wanted to see the finale and say goodbye to the show that had been such a big part of my teenage years.

I will miss it, but I'll always have fond memories of it, and I am NOT ashamed to say that I will be crying tonight.

ETA: Lol, I found the picture of the epic collage I made as a teen:
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Love it when it's good; hate it when it's bad.

There is nothing worse in fandom, besides fandom crazies and drama, than bad fanfiction, especially bad porn. Luckily, it is mostly in the bigger fandoms that the badfic come out; I've found that in the smaller fandoms, the writing tends to be better, simply because it isn't as popular as the bigger ones. That is not to say that there isn't great fics in bigger fandoms, because there are, it can just be hard to sort the good from the bad. Bad fanfiction is why I don't write it myself, but judge from a safe distant. If I write, I want to make sure that my work it is actually good. That said, you can only get better the more you write, so of course there is going to be some bad stuff; it is only natural. I just prefer to learn and get better in secret, and let friends judge instead of the whole internet. I judge my own work too much and don't dare to post it, unless I am sure that it is decent, which I realize can be hard to find out when I don't post it, haha.

I know that you can only get better if you let other people see and give opinions on what you write, but I am too self-critical to post anything, and that is my problem. I don't write much either, I mostly comment on other people's work. Speaking of that...

It isn't easy for me to tell another person that I think their work is bad, which I know isn't going to help anything, but I just can't do it. Either I don't comment or I find something positive to comment on instead; I don't like saying "this was bad!" and hurt someones feelings, so I don't. I don't want to lie either, so I make sure that I mean what I say. If I do comment on something I think is bad, I make sure to compliment on something that I liked. I don't lie to people;  if I write: "OH MY GOD AMAZING!" etc then I really mean it. And when I find typos I let them know as well. I often leave long detailed comments when it is something that I love.

I use to write really bad fanfiction about Lost, Jack/Kate, or 'Jate' as they were called(JATE IS FATE!). I had this long melodramatic story starring them, with a lot of bad English and cheesy writing, and I just laugh when I think about it. I also wrote a lot of original writing, which I have fond memories of, but I am sure it wasn't much better.
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The worst memories? I was bullied for a while so here is some: I got big chunks of snow thrown after me on my way to gym class, a long with my friends. I was called 'a shadow' because I depended too much on one of my friends, which in one instance resulted in people banging on their tables, yelling "shadow, shadow, shadow!!!", while I was in the room; some people even parodied the song from The Bear in The Blue house: "where, where is the shadow?!?!" which was pretty creative, I must say. I got back at them, though, by singing "Where, where is your beauty?!?!" to one of them. They stopped after that, because, yeah, they couln't deny that that was true. I was also teased because I wasn't good at carrying a lot of books at once, I was so tiny, so they'd end up falling down on the floor, and laugther would follow.

This is tame compared to what others went through.

I wasn't popular in highschool or in middle school; I chose certain friends, who were not well liked, and of course that wasn't 'in'. I was shy, sensitive, quiet, odd, silly, and introverted, and I depended too much on my friends. Later, when I did develop a personality, I was silly, weird, and wasn't afraid to be embarrasing or do embarrasing things, which wasn't 'cool'. There were certain rules on how to behave; anyone who was a little quirky and different was labeled a loser, so I was one of them. I wasn't in the geeky group, because homework and classes didn't interest me. I was more, like, in the group for people who were themselves and didn't give a crap(or pretended not to care) about what anyone else thought. (Janis, and Damian in Mean Girls, I think) But I was always there for my friends and they were there for me.(and they are the reason I practiced my English, so yay). I don't think that people really disliked me, I was just an easy target; insecure, weird, silly, and not mean. (at one point I was referred to as 'weird, but pretty'. Uh thanks assholes? Lol)...

So yes, I had some bad years, but after certain people left, and people matured, we all became friends. 10th grade was actually a really good year. In the end, I ended up having a good time. My early teen years weren't so easy; but I had some really good friends, so that helped me get through it all.

As for what I've learned? Kids are mean. It doesn't matter what you do; once you are labeled something, it will stick, all you can do is try to have fun; fuck the haters. That will, in the end, make you the better person, and you'll leave high-shcool knowing that you didn't ruin someone elses teen years; that is something. Also, people change, and they mature; holding grudges against these people won't help you in the long run( although I still struggle with that, but that's another thing).

No doubt that it had an affect on me, but there is nothing to do about it know; gotta look forward instead.<3
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So, Li contacted me tonight, and asked if she could come over. I was surprised and happy about this, so I said yes. Then she messaged me and said that she had to be home around 09.30 pm, and I was like, oh, uhm, okay, but I still looked forward to it. Then I got another message that said that she had to cancel because her brother got home and she had to leave earlier, and if we could hang out tomorrow. I haven't answered back yet, because I am pissed/hurt.

I'd just gotten myself ready and I really looked forward to her coming over and then she cancels on me, when we haven't even seen each other in ages. Yes, she asked if we could hang out tomorrow instead, and that is all fine and dandy, but she can't just ask me to hang out tonight, suddenly and out of the blue, and then think everything is fine when she cancels. This is so typical, so very her, and it is one of the million reasons that I decided to break off this toxic friendship in the first place. I haven't asked her to hang out since what she did to me on News Years Eve, and I'll be damned if I'll let her into my life again if she keeps doing this shit. For those of you who don't know who she is, Li is/was my best friend since we were 6 years old; we were in the same class, on the same cheer-team, together all through high-school, and very close; and we had fights, so many fights. We were like Yin and Yang; she was blond, popular, confident, and I was darkhaired, unpopular, shy and insecure. Despite all of this, we kept coming back to each other, or rather, I kept coming back to her, even when she broke up our friendship and was bad for me. Around her, I was always jealous, self-hating, insecure, and always, always second best, but I still had a good time with her. Basically, I depended too much on her, and it hurt me. After she had broken off our 'best friendship' as she called it, for the second time (the first time being when we were kids) we still occasionally talked, and I was still depending on her. Then, after she did this to me on New Yorks Eve and ditched me for her new friends, I began to realize (after a breakdown and a talk with my dad) that our friendship was over, and that I would never depend on her again. She has always been bad for me, but I loved her, and depended on her, so I let her treat me like she wanted. Now she wants to talk to me again, and she expects us to just be 'casual friends', but she has no idea that it probably can't be like that for me. Either she is a close friend, a best friend, someone I can't depend on, or she is out of my life. I am willing ot just be casual friends, but I don't know if I can do that.

I still love her, and we've had so many good times together, but I just don't know.

TL;DR: what do you guys say?
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1. Jon is a comedian, making fun of people and pointing out their mistake is his job; HE IS UNDER NO OBLIGATION TO BE A JOURNALIST, NO MATTER HOW MUCH PEOPLE SEE HIM AS ONE. I have thought a lot about this and the fact of the matter is: Jon doesn't claim to be a journalist, so, no, he can't be expected to be one. This has nothing to do with 'having guts' or 'being edgy' because Jon is still a comedian; and giving your opinion on things/pointing out stupidity/making fun of people; STILL FALLS UNDER THE CATEGORY OF A COMEDIAN. And he is not the only comedian to do this; he just happen to be more honest and factual than others;  but that still doesn't make him a journalist. Saying that he doesn't go after the people you want him to, not always do hard-hitting interviews,  doesn't matter, because he does his show from his point of view, and is under no obligation to do what the news should. Critisizing the news doesn't mean that he should take it upon himself to fix it, that is not his job. The fact that he is more factual and balanced than the other news channels, is a bonus, and says something about the state of the media; not the state of him or his show.

2. You are a fucking idiot. You say that 'enough liberals do' so it's okay to make generalizations. Well, hmm, most of the teabaggers I've encountered are dumb, racist, ignorant, calls Obama for Hitler, and believe that Obama is the Anti Christ/not born in America. By your account, that makes it okay to make generalizations, right? Except, you don't think so, because it's people you agree with, which makes you, wait for it, A HYPOCRIT.

3. I can't wait for Jon and The Daily Show writers to own you on this; or even better, ignore you, because you don't deserve to even get mentioned on their show; THAT'S HOW PATHETIC YOU ARE. Join the ranks of Tucker Carlson, Jim Cramer, and John Gibson, bb, cuz soon that will be all you have.
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http://community.livejournal.com/ontd_political/5414214.html?thread=328392006#t328392006

There is a difference between being on CNN and on Comedy central; or there should be. Jon has always said that he and his show concentrate on the things that they have opinions on, not that they are 'truth tellers' of some kind; because they aren't.They're not trying to get people to change their minds about things, they don't claim to have all the answers, so whether people agree with them or not, it doesn't matter, because they do their shows out of their point of view, and are honest about it.

The media, on the other hand, claims to be unbiased News, when they are actually creating a certain narrative of their network, and then they try to maintain it by being biased, leave out facts, and have opinion shows on it.
 
The difference between CNN/FOX/MSNBC and TDS, is that TDS doesn't claim to have all the facts, they openly admit that they are biased,  have opinions, when the 'real news' don't. 

I don't think of The Daily Show as a news; they might be less biased than the real 'news channels', because they try to keep facts and earth logic in their shows, but they still show their point of view on things; I just happen to agree with them. This is why people have come to count on them instead of the 'real news', to get a more honest view on things. But despite this, the fact is, that they still do their show in of their point of view, point out things *they* find stupid; not things they want other people to believe.

They just don't have a narrative to maintain, so they can often be more honest, show both sides of the media, while proving their points.

A lot of people agree with what they point out, and that has put them in a place where it gets harder and harder for them to deny their own impact; the impact that they never asked for in the first place.
Jon is not the one claiming to be a journalist, yet people are focusing on him and expecting him to be doing a job that the media has long since abandoned. The media has stopped doing their job, and because of The Daily Show pointing out this, people have come to expect them to do the job instead, which they never claimed to do.

It should be said, though, that they do sometimes use this impact to their advantage, which does make them look hypocritical. They use the comedy defense when people critisize them, but point out stupidity and certain situations, when they know people are impacted by it, and believe what they say. But the difference, for me, is that while they do this, they never say that people should take every word they say seriously, like the MSM does.

I do wish that Jon would be honest about this, talk about it, and recognize what many people perceive his show to be. I wish that he would adress this directly without his self-deprecating remarks or jokes, and I hope he will at one point, because he can't have it both ways.

For me, though, it still comes down to this:

There are the media claiming to be news/not biased, but are, giving people biased information, creating a narrative of their network.

Then there is The Daily Show, pointing out this, because no one else does, while still not claiming to be part of the media.

I don't think that it's TDS there should be focus on, but the MSM instead. Jon isn't the one causing the most damage to the society, imho.

Also, I want people to know that despite my Jon stanning I do see other people's valid points about him/TDS and I do think about it. I'm honestly not as blinded by him as people might think. I call him out when I feel like he mess up, and I hope people can see that.

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While everyone's lost, the battle is won...

July 2012

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